Here's a little something I wrote a few days ago. Thought I'd insert it, since it's a good chunk of the process.
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01/06/09
So we’re driving on the 95 somewhere in Maryland… or the state above it. It’s dark, I need to pee, my feet are freezing. Forget sleeping: the thoughts just keep rolling through my mind. Other than because of the enormous lack of things to do, I think this is, in part, due to the situation I find myself in. The year 2009 began just 6 days ago, but for me it’s about to begin tomorrow when we get back to Quebec: to real life. Vacationing in Florida will be over, I’ll be back to the life I left behind three weeks ago.
New Years Eve it hit me. I had no clue whatsoever where I would be in a year from then. It’s quite a scary thought. I have NO IDEA where God will have led me on December 31st 2009. I guess this is where “Trust in the Lord” comes in handy. So true. Back to the point, where will I be? Right now, of course, I have more than one option before me. Which path to choose? How to be sure it’s the right one? Basically, it comes down to Bible School… somewhere.
First off, why spend a year at Bible School instead of going straight to University? Conviction. I believe God is asking me to put aside at least one year among the 60 + some that I will live to be completely immersed in studying His Word. I know that through this year, I will be challenged beyond measure, I will learn so much in so little time, I will grow, step by step, into the person God wants me to be. I want to go to a bible school to learn more about Him, to learn more about myself, to concentrate on my faith, on why I believe and what I believe on a much deeper level. I want my mind to grasp a little more how enormous and almighty the God I want to serve is. I want to learn effectively to be able to share effectively. I want to take this step of faith, not because someone is making me take it, but because I want to take it and so does He. I want the foundations of my adult life to be deep in His Word, in His promises for me.
In one sentence: I want to be closer to Him, for real, for life.
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So now the question is: where do I go? Since the time I first started thinking about Bible School, I think I've changed my mind at least 15 times. So far, I've considered schools in Brazil, Australia, Canada, USA, Hungary, Italy, Argentina, each time being certain that I would go there. Now I realize that I don't have time to change my mind anymore: I have to get the application process started! I'm still weighing the differences between Hungary and Argentina.
Until two days ago, I really wasn't sure. I wanted to wait and see if I'd have my Spanish 102 class during the winter semester. I had told myself that if I had it, I'd go, for sure, to Argentina. Taking the second class in Cegep would become an extra motivation for the Argentinian option since half of the year there will be taught in Spanish. When I didn't get it scheduled on my time table, I was really disappointed. Basically, thinking over it, I realized that I was holding on to that possibility as an excuse to make up my mind once and for all. I think that, deep down, I really do want to go to Argentina after all. It may be a little more expensive than Hungary (and that's a subject of prayer for me!), but I think I'd enjoy the school there more.
I'm giving myself another week or two to pray about it and make my decision. Then, we'll start the application process. Ahhh Exciting!
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Prayer requests
That God may show me where exactly He wants me to be next fall.
Financial aspect of it all is a faith stretcher : As I've decided to put this summer aside to go to Africa on a Missions trip with JET, I need to accumulate a little more money in a little less time. God will provide.